Be Kind: Backup

Someone you care about is grieving? You wish to be helpful and don't know how? I have an idea for you: tell them to backup. 

Backup? What do you mean "backup"? Do you think now is the right time to mention such a thing to the bereaved? 

Yes, I do: backing up videos, photos, texts and memories related to the deceased could be a very big - and very practical, meaningful and helpful - act of kindness. And not a moment too soon, too. 

The following stories are all in Hebrew and from Israel, but I believe the story is a universal one (and would appreciate receiving relevant links and print screens in other languages): 

2016. Anat Dolev passes away. Her son begs for help retrieving her stolen smartphone with the last pictures of her on it. 

 Facebook printscreen

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2015. Idan Shacham begs for help retrieving the stolen smartphone of Hodaya Goren. On it were pictures and memories of their recently deceased mutual friend Bar Shavit, who died a few months earlier.  

Facebook printscreen

(Link no longer available)

2014. Myriam Safrai begs for help retrieving her stolen smartphone. It contained un-backed up pictures of Muli, her five years old son, who passed away three weeks earlier. 

Facebook printscreen

2013. Roni Lahav - Vidra begs for help retrieving her stolen ipad. It contained un-backed up videos of her late husband, Yuval Vidra, with their baby boy Idan.

Facebook printscreen

2013. Tzach Cohen begs for help retrieving the stolen smartphone of his sister, Noy. It was stolen shortly after her death. 

Facebook printscreen

2005. Haim Avraham begs for help retrieving his stolen computer. On it were un-backed up memories and pictures of his dead son, Benny.

ynet printcsreen

This is why telling grieving people to backup could be such an act of kindness. Because pictures, videos, texts and memories might be lost irretrievably, if they are only on a single device which might get stolen or broken - smartphone, tablet, laptop, computer. Do it gently, but do it: suggest that they back up as much as possible to cloud storing and/or a portable, external hard drive. If you really wanna be helpful bring all the necessary cables along and find out for them how could it be done with their specific device/s and/or operating system/s. Don't expect them to think about it themselves - they are grieving. This is what you, as someone who cares about them and wishes to assist and support them during this difficult time, could be there for. 

When a tragedy occurs there is so much pain we can't do anything about and we can't ease. Let's at least ease up where we can and make sure the materials memories are made of are well kept. 

This is also why I say therapists, psychologists, social workers and other professionals and volunteers who support bereaved people should be trained in digital matters as well: to make sure there is someone there to tell grieving people to backup, and now.